


Her life had been good

by Sunshine3star



Category: Original Work
Genre: Death, Laughter, Love, Sickness, Sorrow, enjoying life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-25
Updated: 2019-06-25
Packaged: 2020-05-19 16:30:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19360594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sunshine3star/pseuds/Sunshine3star
Summary: to my little Angel...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> to my little Angel...

There had been a lot of love in her live.  
Hugs and caresses, loving murmuring and people constant looking out for her.  
More than she liked sometimes.  
Her life was full of smiles and laughter, but also tears and sad eyes.  
She regularly fell asleep in her mothers’ arms, feeling safe and satisfied.  
Or, kind of satisfied at least.

In the beginning, she thought that everything was the way it was supposed to be.  
That everything was normal, the way everybody lived.  
But as she got older, she noticed the difference.  
That she was different.  
The other children could run around, while she was watching them.  
She would run with them for a while, pretending she didn’t feel lightheaded and winded.  
All she wanted, was to play.  
How come they didn’t get tired like she did?

Meals was her least favorite thing.  
Everybody else enjoyed their food, talking about how good it was and stuffing their faces.  
But for her, food was just difficult.  
Sure, some of it tasted good, but it was so much work eating it.  
Making her tired, making her nauseous, making her winded.  
So, she didn’t like food.

But her life was good.  
Going to the zoo and petting the tiny goats.  
Playing in the garden with her sister, in the sandbox, or the swing, or the slide.  
Making new friends wherever she went, giving small smiles and a wave.

And she went a lot of places.  
Slept in a lot of different beds, looking out of a lot of different windows.  
She saw a lot of fascinating things, fascinating people.  
Always smiling at her, but sometime with sad eyes.  
She didn’t understand why people got sad eyes when they looked at her, she herself smiled almost all the time!  
Life was good, she was happy.

Some of the people, she recognized, knowing she had seen them before but not remembering when.  
A lot of those people used white clothes, and she didn’t like that.  
They always touched her with their hands, and that flat cold thing, and sticking things to her.  
Putting that cold stuff on her chest and moving that hard stick everywhere.  
She didn’t like that.  
That made her cry in anger.  
Witch made her winded.  
And tired.

Sometimes, when she was not feeling like she normally did, they even pocked her finger or her arm, and that hurt.  
A lot.  
Sometimes, mummy and daddy gave her to some of those smiling people in white clothes, and they made her sleep.  
She didn’t like that.  
Waking up feeling sick, feeling not like herself.

But life was good.  
Lots of love, lots of smiles, and lots of fun.

She loved her sister, they could play together forever, the best of friends.  
But sometime, when she didn’t feel like she normally did, she would pull her hair or hit her.  
Because her sister was not like her, she was like those other kids, those that could run around while she sat quietly watching.

Her sister enjoyed her food, didn’t get tired when eating, and could go to kindergarten.  
Kindergarten was heaven, she was sure of it.  
All those kids, she could run around with them all day, she was sure of it!  
They probably didn’t have mealtime there, so she could just play all day.  
She got mad thinking about it, mad at her sister, mad that she wasn’t like everybody else.

But her life was good.  
Cuddling and sleeping in mommy’s lap.  
Putting on makeup and taking silly pictures with her sister.  
Laughing.  
So much laughing...

She was getting bigger now, understood more, and knew that she was soon going to the hospital so the doctors could fix her heart.  
She was a big girl, two and a half year, and understood everything.  
She knew that after the doctors had fixed her heart, she too could run around with the other kids.  
Maybe she would like mealtimes better to, mommy and daddy said everything would be better.

Her life was good, but soon it would be even better!


	2. Chapter 2

Shushing your kid when they get anesthesia never got easier.  
But somewhere around the twentieth time, it became routine.  
Living at the hospital became the new normal, even more normal than before.  
But they knew she needed that surgery, even if it looked like she was just getting sicker and sicker after it.  
She was just taking her time in getting used to the changes in her body.

Weeks went by, and tings moved the wrong way.  
Treatments under narcosis, tests and side effects.  
In and out of intensive care.  
Trying out medicine after medicine, running after her with her oxygen so she could play with the other kids.  
The other sick kids, living at the hospital along them.

But her life was good.  
Lots of love, hugs and laughter.  
Playing and singing and exploring.  
Meeting clowns and painting.  
Building a whole town out of sand in the sandbox.  
Wade in the fountain when the sun burned hot.  
Walking hand in hand with big sister.

Slowly, she needed more and more oxygen.  
Running became walking.  
The town in the sandbox became a single house, before she gave up.

Her life was filled with dancing in the bed, new movies on the tv and daddy making a fool of himself.

Slowly, she lost her leg muscles.  
Moving less and less, preferring to be in her stroller instead of walking herself.  
Watching the other kids playing instead of playing with them.

She had her birthday party, wearing a golden crown.  
Three years old.  
Woken up in the morning to everybody singing a birthday song.  
Her bed filled with presents, making her eyes huge.  
She played with them with her sister for a long time...  
A new dress making her pretty, an ice cream eaten outside in the sun.

Slowly, watching the kids play tired her more and more.  
Making her prefer being outside where there was quieter.  
The wind dancing in the threes, birds singing, and the sound off the nearby creak.  
She got hold of a water gun, and made grandma shoot at mommy.  
Laughing out loud when mommy got hit!

Slowly, she couldn’t walk more than a few step at the time.  
Holding daddy’s hand tight, trembling legs and pride in her eyes.  
She cloud still do it!

Then one day, she couldn’t stand by herself.  
All her energy went to breathing, always fighting to get enough.

Slowly, we had to realize that this was it.  
She was losing her battle.


	3. Chapter 3

She spent most of the time sleeping.  
When she woke up, there was always a hand holding her left hand.  
And another hand holding her right hand.  
She was surrounded by her loved ones.  
Caressing her, making her smile, making her brave.

She was getting tired now.  
There was no energy to play.  
Or sit up in bed.  
Or talk.

But her life had been good.  
All the memories of a life lived, lived to the fullest.

Last night, she told mommy that she felt fine, she really did!  
No more nausea, finally.  
No more pain, or less pain then she could remember ever having.

Her arms and legs felt heavy.  
She could not move them anymore.  
But she could still feel mommy’s lips kissing her temple.  
Daddy’s strong arms holding her tight.  
That felt nice.

Big sister was so quiet.  
They both new what was happening, she wanted to tell her sister it was okay.  
Because it was.  
Somehow, she knew her sister already knew that, though.  
They could just sit together, not saying anything.  
Just be.  
The best of sisters, forever and ever.

Her life had been good.  
Filled with laughter and love.  
Ups and downs.  
But all in all, it had been good.

She could no longer hold her head, her eyes couldn’t see, but she could still hear.  
And feel.  
Feel the love all around her.  
Like she always had.  
Hear the soft words, telling her to let go.  
That she had been fighting long enough.  
That she deserved peace and quiet.

The radio was playing in the background, her loved ones talking calmly around her.  
She was letting go now.  
Quiet laughter and talk of happy memories faded to the background.  
She felt calm.

Her life had been good.  
It was time.


End file.
